Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.

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(610): Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it. http://tfl.nu/867y

Replies (16) Good night (1633) Bad night (513)
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(210): View more from Texas

Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys

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(210): Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys http://tfl.nu/9bus

Replies (7) Good night (596) Bad night (1042)
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(706): View more from Georgia

That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.

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(706): That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night. http://tfl.nu/8vqf

Replies (10) Good night (5040) Bad night (925)
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(207): View more from Maine

I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet

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(207): I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet http://tfl.nu/5wz6

Replies (12) Good night (9100) Bad night (1145)
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(502): View more from Kentucky

Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.

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(502): Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore. http://tfl.nu/k6j5

Replies (3) Good night (1988) Bad night (877)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.

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(724): For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you. http://tfl.nu/dykx

Replies (8) Good night (3382) Bad night (782)
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(614): View more from Ohio

My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.

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(614): My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet. http://tfl.nu/omff

Replies (11) Good night (793) Bad night (1780)
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(210): View more from Texas

I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.

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(210): I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now. http://tfl.nu/26wy

Replies (9) Good night (723) Bad night (1801)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.

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(262): I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could. http://tfl.nu/ywgy

Replies (5) Good night (922) Bad night (505)
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(318): View more from Louisiana

I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.

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(318): I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case. http://tfl.nu/3tdp

Replies (11) Good night (1766) Bad night (459)
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(310): View more from California

Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today

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(310): Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today http://tfl.nu/yb5r

Replies (5) Good night (946) Bad night (409)
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(313): View more from Michigan

he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"

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(313): he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH" http://tfl.nu/f18j

Replies (9) Good night (2044) Bad night (566)
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(510): View more from California

She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.

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(510): She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again. http://tfl.nu/2r7a

Replies (2) Good night (625) Bad night (913)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all

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(651): So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all http://tfl.nu/5r9b

Replies (2) Good night (663) Bad night (367)
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(573): View more from Missouri

Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.

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(573): Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them. http://tfl.nu/c182

Replies (8) Good night (844) Bad night (339)

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