when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize