sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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