A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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