that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
