Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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