just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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