I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
