Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
