I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize