Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
