Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
ugly people sure do ruin things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
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