Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
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