He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
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Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
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Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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