After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
