Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
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