you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
send nudes
from the living room?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
