so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
