I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
