PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
