I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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