Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
They have beer where we have blood.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize