If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
