her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
being pregnant is like rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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