she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
