It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
cat food counts as protein by the way
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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