Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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