I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
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