I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize