brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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