I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
