we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
