Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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