he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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