She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
