My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
