So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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