Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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