At least make sure they are 18
Why
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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