how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
