I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
