he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize