M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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