Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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