I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
