ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
