discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize