Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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