After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
