my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize