idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Randomize
