it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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