Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
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